Blog 3

Growing up in my family, which is multiracial but identifying solely as African American, I was taught that women have to look a certain way to identify as beautiful and not become overweight. I can remember as a child my grandmother and great grandmother would always say you have to “act and look like a lady” and that “you can’t do what the men do.”  I also remember how harsh they would be on the other girls you had gained weight, usually after child birth. My “Ma Dear” would bluntly say “why are you so fat” or “what are you eating” or “You have to wear your corset after that baby born” SMH but LOL’n too.  She never cared who was around or heard the insults. Of course back then I didn’t know they were insults until I became older and overweight too.  I remember my thoughts when I would hear her say “What are you eating” I’m thinking the same thing you eat and everyone else is eating.  We grew up on southern soul food, some call it comfort foods. We love mashed potatoes and macaroni and cheese………..Let’s not leave out the collard greens with all of the fat meat in it. Yummy!! 

(Delicious, but not the healthiest) As I got older, I realized that there were healthier options to eating and lots of reasons why one person can eat certain foods without consequences while others can’t. You know growing up I never had baked fish, it was always deep fried.  I love baked fish and fresh garden salad. This is swap that I made as part of a healthier lifestyle.

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Media is great resource on how all things are portrayed both negatively and positively. You have all of these perfect IG models with perfect bodies that make you question your existence. Who doesn’t want a perfect body? Diet and exercise vs Surgery? Hmm, decisions, decisions. Media tells us about the quick fixes and gives a lot of false reality. However, it also gives us some realistic points on things too. It really depends on what you are searching for. Media: The good, the bad and the ugly.

     Media "Surgery Body" Models    Natural "Normal" Bodies                 

Its all in what you want as an individual and what makes you happy. 

My Great grandmother ‘Ma Dear” or “Mother Dear” depending on how you said it, was always a lady. She wore a dress with her pearls, every day and always crossed her legs. She made sure her “face was on” before she left out of the house. It was simple, a little rouge and lipstick was all.  I believe when you look good, you feel good but I won’t always “put my face on” before I leave the house. Make-up doesn’t define who I am.

          

I don’t necessarily think that it is a cultural thing versus just a concern.  I know that after battling with obesity, what mattered most was how I viewed myself more than how others viewed me. Me personally, I wasn’t happy being 100 pounds overweight so I did something about it.  Hearing my grandmother’s say certain things caused a lot of self-esteem issues and that was the weakness. The strength was overcoming the issues and becoming a better version of myself.